Valentine’s Day seems to be one of the most controversial holidays. First of all, conflicting stories exist about the origin of Valentine’s Day. From its inception, Valentine’s Day seems to have been about promoting an agenda. Whether it was Saint Valentine himself defying Claudius II by remaining Christian in a pagan society, his marrying Roman soldiers despite the governmental prohibition, or the conversion of the pagan celebration of Lupercalia, the real reason for Valentine’s Day seems to be rooted less in romance and more in politics.
Today, although Valentine’s Day purports to be about love and romance, it seems to be more about the money. We’ve been programmed that roses, stuffed animals, cards, and chocolates are the perfect expressions of love for the holiday. The bigger the heart-shaped box or the more massive the teddy bear, the bigger the love. If you really, really love her, a heart-shaped diamond necklace can do the trick.
Many men are seduced by the ease of purchasing such gifts and succumb to the advertising rather than making a more authentic romantic gesture. Women can buy into the advertising as well, expecting such tokens and feeling upset if they do not get them. Thus, the obligation to purchase these mementos of love ironically strips them of their significance. The pre-packaged heart-covered, heart-shaped, paraphernalia takes the real heart out of Valentine’s Day.
“Expectation is the root of all heartache.”William Shakespeare
Women don’t really want that heart-shaped box of drugstore candy. Frankly, the fancy box does not necessarily represent the quality of the contents any more than it reflects the real feelings of the giver. Yet our cultural conditioning can bring disappointment if we don’t get the stuff of Valentine’s Day.
The idea of a day to reflect on the love we have for the people around us that mean the most is a wonderful idea. But rather than giving tokens of our affection, we need to really give them our affection. We do that with time, with attention, with consideration, and with care. That’s not to say you can’t give flowers or candy, but we need to remember that is only a symbol. Don’t let those mementos stand alone to express your feelings. Write your own words in the cards. DO something special to SHOW your feelings. Spend time with your partner. Give them your full attention.
Take Valentine’s Day back by giving a gift that truly comes from the heart. Show your partner this Valentine’s Day you are still falling in love with them. Give them your full attention. Devote your evening to them. Ballroom Dance is a perfect way to dedicate that time to your partner and each other. Get a gift that not only shows your love but helps to cement it; call today to schedule a lesson.